This is a post from Nadine Thornhill at Adorkable Undies. Here are 11 reasons why masturbation is awesome!
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Although technically masturbation isn’t a thing, like all sex, it’s an activity. And I do have me some fun at the activity centre! I love masturbation! I love it in concept. I am head-over-heels and I love it in practice. I’ve got it bad for my hands, yo. And my toys. And a few specific household items. I’ve been masturbating for a long time. So long I don’t remember a time when I didn't masturbate. So, when I say that masturbation is awesome, I’m speaking from lots of experience. Don’t believe me? Just consider the following benefits:
1. No one ever regrets it
No one ever masturbates and thinks ‘Dang! That was the worst part of my day!‘
No one ever masturbates and thinks ‘Dang! That was the worst part of my day!‘
2. It's a fast release
It’s 4:00 PM. You’ve just come home from work. The kids will be home from soccer at any minute, you still have to make dinner and you’re horny as hell. Ping! Try mastubation – for a quick and healthy fix.
It’s 4:00 PM. You’ve just come home from work. The kids will be home from soccer at any minute, you still have to make dinner and you’re horny as hell. Ping! Try mastubation – for a quick and healthy fix.
3. You don't even need to leave your bedroom!
Masturbation is the thrill of exploration in the comfort of your own home.
Masturbation is the thrill of exploration in the comfort of your own home.
4. Releases endorphins
Masturbation releases endorphins, which relax the muscles. Try it as part of your post-workout routine.
Masturbation releases endorphins, which relax the muscles. Try it as part of your post-workout routine.
5. Cures a headache
Masturbation releases endorphins, which provide pain relief. Try it the next time you have a headache.
Masturbation releases endorphins, which provide pain relief. Try it the next time you have a headache.
6. Fantasy
Yearning for frisky times with someone who isn’t your long-term, monogamous partner? Don’t want to negotiate an open relationship? Infidelity not your style? Fondle your sexy parts and enjoy a hot, fantasy tryst, courtesy of masturbation!
Yearning for frisky times with someone who isn’t your long-term, monogamous partner? Don’t want to negotiate an open relationship? Infidelity not your style? Fondle your sexy parts and enjoy a hot, fantasy tryst, courtesy of masturbation!
7. No rejection in masturbation
How hard is it to convince you to have sex with you?
How hard is it to convince you to have sex with you?
8. Turns your partner on
Granting your partner’s request to watch you masturbate triples your chances of getting applause.
Granting your partner’s request to watch you masturbate triples your chances of getting applause.
9. Natural cure for insomnia
It’s 1:00 AM. You’re still tossing and turning and you’ve got that big presentation in the morning. Try masturbation: a safe, natural sedative!
It’s 1:00 AM. You’re still tossing and turning and you’ve got that big presentation in the morning. Try masturbation: a safe, natural sedative!
10. Reduces cancer risk
Masturbating can reduce the risk of cervical infection and prostate cancer. Three cheers for healthy nethers!
Masturbating can reduce the risk of cervical infection and prostate cancer. Three cheers for healthy nethers!
11. Multiple ways of pleasure
Some flexible folk can masturbate orally! Even if you’re not one of the lucky few who can get your tongue to your promise land, you can see videos of it online. Trust me – that shit’s pretty cool.
Some flexible folk can masturbate orally! Even if you’re not one of the lucky few who can get your tongue to your promise land, you can see videos of it online. Trust me – that shit’s pretty cool.
In conclusion, masturbation rules. So when this 9-5 work day world has got you down, get a hold of yourself – literally and take a few moments for some self-stimulation!
Nadine is a sexual health educator, playwright, poet, burlesque performer, partner and parent living in Ottawa, Ontario. The plays and poetry she creates tend toward subjects such as clitorises, vibrators and non-monogamy. She enjoys candy, fashion and dreck television. She does not care for pants. Find her on Twitter @NadineThornhill. She also blogs on Adorkable Undies. Find her blog on Facebook and Pinterest.
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